Tuesday: Slow morning walking in the dark, the days become shorter. I feel alone in the morning when I walk to work at 6:30 am. The street feels colder I miss the light in the morning. I miss the company. Most days I am alone...till almost 8 am ... for the first 90 minutes sitting watching my screen. I like solitude in the mornings lately.
I wanted to go to UBC to the Museum but my funds are alittle short till tomorrow and payday. Instead I watch episodes of Nashville and snacking on chips and salsa. I am halfway through the first season funny how times flies. I didn't like I planned just laundry.
I am looking forward to going to the island this weekend. I can not wait till friday afternoon till I leave on the ferry. Feels like going home. This will be my first weekend back since labour day and first weekend of fall. Rob has the fireplace going and is cleaning out the sauna for us.
I made peace with stacy today. I offered her hope to go forward but I still not spoken on the phone. I am taking a break from her right now and getting some space. I am not wanting to end the friendship just some space to reflect and calm down.
Today is one of those quiet days during the week for me ... no running.. no yoga..no going anywhere but maybe I should have left my apartment. I am not sure what is planned for me...but I have keep focused on my goals of change. The change will happen.
I am currently six weeks away from going to Managua. I am feeling freedom as my vacation approaches. Somewhere under the same sky we all can see the same stars, this thought is uniting.
As for reflecting ... at more at peace this time of year than I was last year. Last year I struggling to define myself .... within a crappy vampire relationship ... maybe that is why I am so frustrated and angry at Stacy... I know where her current relationship will lead her...and I can see the signs...spending a whole alot of talking and waiting for something .... he never promised would happen.
I'd like to end this entry with a small space for my soul to recharge and refocus...the universe does not give you more than you can handle...and will always provide. I feel a small hug from the heavens each night I crawl into bed..for I close my eyes to sleep.
XOXXO Lovebug...
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