I am so tired and exhausted all the time right now. I do not understand why it is so difficult for me to be awake. I dying in my current job, so I today I decided I needed change. I need to switch up something. Everyday is same....same tasks dragging my feet. I need to change ....soon or a holiday. Stress Leave?? Anyone...I am just exhausted of myself.
Most stressful I have gained 10 pounds since April. I guess the stress of CFA. I don't know. I know I do not want to keep feeling this way. I keep running and working out but I just feel so sad deep downside.
I am sliding backwards...I feel trapped mostly by the myself. I just want to be recused. I have even started buying lotto tickets. I use to think this exhaustion would go away now Grant and I are over. I feel guilty because when I am with Rob...I just want to sleep. I just want some peace of mind. I use to feel depressed...now I just feel hopeless. I am trying to stop myself from believing these agreements I made with myself. I hope this passes soon.
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