Your Death ... and my Plane Ticket to Spain

Your death of brain cancer pushed me to do book my trip to Europe. It's a remember our time is short and yours was even shorter. I have not seen you in 16 years but it feels like yesterday we walked out of homeroom and into the world. You walk was shorter than mine, I still can't believe cancer took you. Actually I can't believe cancer is crawling it's way into my life. Time and space feels so real.

I think this is reason why I've pushed myself to become more mindful, I'm excited to go back to yoga again this week. I'm looking forward to not coughing and sharing the spare with others. I just to shine again .... bright and strong. I've slip and I'm coming back ...

Kevin's death this morning was a surprise, it's pushed me back into the light. It's so easy to be here than gone. I can't get over the cancer diagnose. I feel more prepared to lose someone to a car accident than cancer. Feels strange to be here at 36, feels strange to be in this body. I don't even know this body anymore .. Ive gained almost 20 pounds. I feel so disconnected to everything ... touch, space, ... everything feels odd.

Lately I've been playing with the idea of traveling to Spain, stopping over in Paris. Its time for some travel time and space for me overseas. I'm needing the spiritual time. I'm needing Kerri ...

Labour Day

I've been since my birthday, I've been carrying a head cold for over two weeks. This feels awful. My head feels like cotton. On a brighter note ... I'm mediating again for over 30 minutes each morning. I'm loving the peaceful calm ... I'm feeling.

Little G is sleeping and missing her daddy, he's gone back to city. She's in heat and feeling grumpy and uncomfortable, poor G ... she's struggling so much.

It's been a while .. since I last wrote to you ...I was so nervous, I almost lost you blog ...

It's almost bed time .. I need to rest and sleep.