Co Operation

We all working together ... different goals ... different places but still we seek love and acceptance. Deep down we all want to be heard.

My mind stirs ... and chatters ... oh monkey mind... how I work with you to find balance and peace. How I was to distract myself from the people pleaser inside my mind. I want to do the right thing all the time ... and be perfect. Somehow in this new position ... the perfectionist has taken over ... my body and life. Yet I feel everyday I am doing something wrong ... and need to trust myself.

I miss my partner and I am working on being their 50/50 for him. I miss him and us ... I finally took sometime and redecorated some of my belongs from my place on the mainland. I am slowly unfolding into this new life. I keep hearing his voice in my mind .... why are you rushing ... you have lotsa time.

I'm looking forward to traveling to Victoria this weekend. I miss the city and the connection I have with busy place. Ethnic restaurants ... and busy streets. Sleepy small town life ... has gotten to me and I am restless.

Lately I feel I am functioning in partial sentences and I am not completing the tasks. Lately I cant put two things ... together ... hush!

Speed Bump

Wednesday ... Hump day one more day till a long weekend. I can not wait till tomorrow is done and three days ... to do what ever I want to do ... such as sleep in. I sit in my office ... watching the sun.

April came and spring is finally here ... feels good to be on the ocean.

I'm drafting an essay .... the past ten years of career movement. I think .. I'm trying find a theme ... but I keep going back to flexiablity and self care. Not career ... I dont think I can express how I feel about creating a legacy .. legacy feels greedy to me and self fish .. who searching to leave a legacy.

I miss downtown food ... I miss cheap japanese food, $1.25 pizza slice and greasy restaurants. I miss the city today and the noise. Somehow I miss Lonsdale and Kits .... streets ... but dreading parking on busy streets.

I'm at a speed bump in my own life ... I'm bored in my head ... tomorrow yoga ...